


Soulmate's Lament

by mynameiskohaku



Category: Game Grumps, Ninja Sex Party - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-10
Updated: 2016-04-10
Packaged: 2018-06-01 10:49:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6515170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mynameiskohaku/pseuds/mynameiskohaku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's cute for your soulmate to sing a duet and for you to have to sing the other half no matter where you are. But it's the awful when your soul mate sings about dicks for a living.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Soulmate's Lament

**Author's Note:**

> Dan is cute and I needed to get this idea out

There was something to be said about finding your soulmate in our world. You'd think a duet with someone who may be close or halfway across the world would be cute and romantic. For many people it was, their soul mates would sing cute duets and silly songs to let their soon to be significant other that they were thinking of them. People readily accepted that they could break into song at any moment, one half of a cosmic serenade.

However, I was the farthest from accepting it you could be. My soulmate had to be a singer or something, because they sang with a frequency that could only be described as annoying. Whether in the car to work or on my way home, they were always singing. They didn't sing conventional duets either, the songs they sang were always so strange, you could only assume they wrote the songs themselves.

Once again on my commute to Maker they began singing what could only be one their favorite songs, a song about punch-out. I groaned aloud as the beginnings of a male voice echoed in my head:

“Bonjour! Hello!  
My name is Glass Joe  
I'm ze toughest French boxer zat you're ever gonna know  
I'll score a TKO then drink a fine Bordeaux”

Begrudgingly I began to nod my head along to his voice, the next bit always gets stuck in my head.

“And flatten all my opponents like croissant dough  
I fight next week for ze champion belt  
Mr. Sandman is tough, and I might need a little help  
So I hired Doc, he once trained an elf  
Named Little Mac so now, I believe in myself!”

It was time for my bit now, the words to a song I didn't know before bubbled from my throat.

“I'm Doc, hi!  
This bitch is gonna die!  
His overall record stands at 1 to 99  
He's been hit in the head seventy-five too many times  
Now he wants to fight Sandman?  
Dear God, WHY?!”

I swore I heard him chuckling likely at my poor rapping skills. I imagined he was next to me, taking up the passenger seat, laughing as he belted his half of the lyrics. This was the third time I'd heard this song this week. Perhaps he was gearing up for a concert again. That was the thing about the duets, every now and then you could hear the bits of conversation they might be having as you went through your half of the song. Though he hadn't mentioned anything about a concert in a long time, so what could be the reason for all this singing?

Gently I shook my head and pulled into the parking lot of your office. He'd momentarily stopped singing and used this silence to quickly scurry into my office and close the door before he began to sing again. He didn't, he didn't sing at all for the rest of the day, and as I started running through the technical side of YouTube analytics, I felt alone. His singing was a nuisance, often coming at the worst of times, but I had to admit that it made feel a little less alone in my empty office.

Often I wondered where he could be, what he was doing, and… If he thought the same things about me too. I looked up from my newly completed work and surmised that I needed a break.

Leaving my office I decided I'd explore. After all, I worked in only one department of a huge company you could call it. I'd only been working here a short two months, but the work that accumulated from their last analytics specialist was so backed up I rarely had any time to leave my office. Not that I'd want to with my soul mate’s peculiar duet choices.

I had my messenger bag, containing my lunch and precious coffee, and headed into the spaces. The usual rows of occupied computers greeted me wherever I went. It seemed that this entire building was just computers. Though I knew the farther down I went the more private offices there’d be. But I knew well enough not to go down there right?

Certainly not as I descended the stairs aiming to peek, not enter but just peek at the stuff around. Deciding that this would be excusable since I was still rather new, I started to walk down the first flight of stairs and right into a guy walking up. We fell backward, and thankfully we ended up on the landing and not tumbling downward. He landed on top of me, and immediately set to righting himself, sitting up and offering me a hand.

“I'm so sorry! I was zoning out and I didn't see. Are you alright?” He apologized, pulling me up. Under normal circumstances that apology would've been accepted and the incident forgotten immediately, but that voice… Was all too familiar to me.

“You…” I whispered, looking up at him fully.

“Wha-”

“Why can't you sing a normal duet you absolute turnip!” I was sorry if bumped into him sure, but in the moment I was livid. This man… This man with huge hair had been making my life awkward for the past 6 months.

“Duets? What are you talking about?” He ruffled his hair, avoiding you glare. He knew, he had to know what you were talking about.

“All those songs! The ones about video games and… And dick jokes! You know what I'm talking about!”

“Mm… Maybe I do, maybe I don't. You'll have to be more specific.” He smiled, chuckling a little when he actually looked at me. He must’ve realized the sharp difference in our height, that, coupled with the fact that he'd initially been afraid of my outburst made for a comedic situation.

“Ugh… Look, man, I don't need to spell it out right?” You pleaded, “We’re soul mates, and you keep singing songs about Punch-Out and I keep having to sing along in public, or in meetings. It's kinda becoming the worst thing.”

“You don't like the songs?” He asked, frowning a little.

“No they're funny. But that's-”

“I'm glad you think so.”

“I… What?” Such a strange statement out of the blue like that.

“I don't know… I guess I was hoping you'd like them, even if they were silly. I'm sorry that I had you singing during meetings though. That must be mortifying.” He laughed.

In spite of myself I laughed with him.  
“It is! Especially that one… Um, the Kirby one! God I was in a meeting with some of the higher ups last week, and at the end when we were shaking hands and stuff it started. My god you should've seen their faces.”

His laughing tapered off into concern.  
“Oh no! It didn't cost you any promotion or anything did it?”

“Oh, nah, they can't promote or demote me at this point. I've got a pretty high position. It's all good.” I smiled.

“Even so, I'd like to formally apologize. You on break?”

“I'm on my lunch break yeah,” I glanced at my watch, “I've still got a good hour and a half left.”

“Good. If you'd be interested, I could take you to lunch. On me, for all the trouble I've caused you.”

“I'd love to… Uh…. I'm sorry I never caught your name.” You murmured apologetically.

“It's Danny.” He smiled, “Yours?”

“Y/N.”

“Well, then, soul mate, how does sushi sound?”

“Perfect.”


End file.
